3rd time's the charm.....

Ok folks, so quick review: My name is Shaun. I'm fly as all hell. I love Japanese food, and shopping. I'm black. I love making fun of other people. I'm a racist, but only on days ending in "y." For those of you who know me, this is nothing new. Especially the part where I just wrote that I am black. Clearly I didn't JUST become black. With that being said, lets get into this damn blog post......Oh, and while we are reviewing, this past friday, someone shouted "white power" to me, and while I was on the train, some idiot told me I must have stayed in the sun too long.

Ok, so the 3rd time must be the charm, cuz guess what the fuck happened to me today.....Some lil idiots decided it was the cool thing to shout "hello nigger" to me as I'm walking down the street. Yes, you read correctly......but it gets better.....

I went to buy my students some small gifts. Granted it was freezing cold today and I was dead tired. But I trudged through all that and copped (bought for the "other folks who might not understand) a few nice things for my kids. I'm walking in the square on my way home when some kids just blurt out "hello nigger." So I turn around, and look as they all (3 of them) start laughing. I keeps it moving. Then these bastards decide to through something at me and it came kinda close to hitting me. They ran (punk asses!)

Now I'm livid at this point. Rude and dirty looks I can deal with. Apparently I am the first EVER black person in Pernik. But being called a nigger and having shit thrown at me? Come on now, wouldn't you agree thats a damn stretch? So I get back home and right to my local Peace Corps (PC) staffer letting them know that not only am I fucking boiling with rage, that I do not appreciate this type of disrespect and it really makes me regret coming to Bulgaria. I mean shit I just let those other 2 comments slide off my back, but this. uummm something different.

It took a sec for Chavvy D to call me from the Peace Corps. He tried to comfort me with the usual Shaun you are great, ur beautiful, ur so smart, everyone loves you, we can't do this without you (ok ok gross exaggeration) but you get the point. And anyone who knows me, knows that I can be the biggest punk, cuz when I say I was crying like a baby, I was really in tears. Not only were my feelings hurt, but I almost felt less than a human. And granted I know that I am great, smart and all those other accolades people associate me with, but words hurt. And 3 insults like that in a row is kinda ridiculous. I mean I really felt (still do) horrible. And once I started crying I couldn't stop.

This is the underlying shit that creeps up from time to time. At first it was a curious lil boy stopped dead in his tracks staring at me in amazing while I was eating my chicken wrap from KFC. Then it was a kid while I was walking in the park, shouting for everyone to hear in Bulgarian, "looks she is black." Now its hello nigger and white power. And I mean really folks, the Bulgarian word for black person is a similar word to nigger, but I hear them say Afro-american on tv and the news. So I know somebody has heard of that term.

So tomorrow I will miss work to go to the PC office to "talk" about this cuz clearly that is all that can be done. this is one of the low points in my life. Where being smart or good looking just isn't enough. Cuz people first and foremost see your skin color. And I know that it's not everyone. Not all Europeans are racist. But it does still exist and it's fucked up when good people like myself have to second guess who they are because of the comments of some dip-shit little kids who don't know any better. And although while writing this I slipped in some jokes here and there, this shit aint that funny, its real.

*DISCLAIMER* I do acknowledge the fact that not only white people are racist. Anyone can be racist. There are people who base their thoughts and perceptions on the color of people's skin. I'm reporting to you a first hand experience and these are just my opinions.